Top 10 Places To Loot If LHC Creates A Black Hole

So what would you do if the large hadron collider created a black hole that was about to suck the earth in? Most people would probably loot, but where to loot first, it’s enough to give you fits? Well, this list will attempt to address this pressing issue and take the hassle out of choosing your next looting location. Without further ado, the top 10 places you should loot in the event of a large hadron collider induced quantum singularity.

10. Adult Video Store

Why?

This is probably the only day on earth where you won’t feel like a complete pervert for going in here and even if you do, who cares right? Noone will be paying any attention to you, they’ll be busy doing some looting of their own, so you can relax and watch your DVDs in peace. And who are all these people to judge you anyway, they’ll be sucked down the same black hole as you and after that happens, I’d like to see someone try and separate their self-righteous molecules from yours.

9. Local Ferrari Dealership

Why?